Ending Self-Abandonment Patterns: When Mind + Body work together -Part 3
by Christianne Zurowski - ICF Certified Life Coach - B.A., B.Ed., C.O.C., C.E.C.
Oct 30, 2024
From Guilt to Empowerment: How Embodied Coaching Transforms Choices
In the first 2 parts of this Blog series, we talked about building self-awareness—learning to recognize our automated reactions & responses. We discussed the importance of getting familiar with our behavioural patterns as well as the more subtle physical patterns that alert us when we are about to fall into your old habits of self-abandonment. Now, it’s time to DO something with this awareness: making different choices.
Unlike the slow and murky waters of talk therapy and mindset work, the body responds quickly to contrasts. Titrating between opposites is an approach that helps us FEEL the distinction between two ways of being: between what you already DO versus what you WANT to do instead; between what you're scared of doing versus and it's other extreme.
For example:
If your fists clench (when you're mad), unclench them.
If your breath speeds up (when you're nervous), slow it down.
If your shoulders creep up to your ears (when you're worried), drop them down.
If you lean forward like you’re ready for a fight (when you're frustrated), take a step back.
These shifts may sound simple (and yes, I am picking simple ones to demonstrate my point. There is lots of complexity & nuance in embodiment work), but they're profoundly impactful.
Let me show you how by telling you about one of my clients who put this into practice and experienced a life-changing transformation.
Case Study: Reclaiming Power in the Smallest of Choices
My client, a woman with multiple food allergies, was feeling deeply anxious about an upcoming trip to a foreign country. Their traditional cuisine wasn't compatible with her body, and she dreaded the thought of offending anyone by declining the food offered—especially bread. She feared being seen as difficult, or worse, rude. But this was more than just a touch of social anxiety; it stemmed from a lifelong habit of people-pleasing and a belief that she was “too much” for others to handle.
As a child, she had absorbed the idea that her big emotions and sensitivities were overwhelming to others. She learned early on to quiet her needs and minimize her reactions for the sake of others’ comfort. This belief became so ingrained that even her food allergies felt like an imposition—she thought asking for alternatives or declining certain foods was “too much” to ask. Even though she logically knew this wasn’t true, her body reacted otherwise. Every time she imagined saying no to bread, her stomach tied in knots and a lump formed in her throat. No matter what her mind knew to be true, her body just wouldn't follow suit.
Enter embodied coaching...
Embodied Coaching in Action
Together, we worked through these physical reactions. First, we practiced rolling her shoulders back, creating space in her body, and focusing on her breath to ease the knot in her stomach. We also rehearsed a simple phrase—"No, thank you, I don’t want any bread."—until it felt more natural and less choked by anxiety. By adding breath and movement, we worked to make this simple act of boundary-setting feel not only manageable but welcome in her body.
Next, we incorporated something even more transformative: archetypal embodied poses. We worked with 2 specific poses to allow her body to literally feel a new way of responding—strong, grounded, and empowered. Over just a few sessions and with some daily practice, she began to reshape how her body responded to moments of discomfort.
When she left for her vacation, she was armed not only with the words she needed but also with the embodied power to say them. The result? She reported back feeling more empowered than ever! She was able to set her boundaries with ease, say no without guilt or shame, and finally prioritize her own very real digestive needs—without the emotional turmoil she used to feel. She couldn't believe the transformation?! And what's more, it trickled into so many other parts of her life!
The Power of Embodied Coaching: The Mind + Body Connection
This isn’t just a mental shift; it’s a physical one. There’s an incredible amount of power in embodied practices, but it’s hard to grasp until you experience it firsthand. It’s not about dissecting every emotional belief from childhood; it’s about learning to physically FEEL differently in the present. It's about allowing your physical body to work in unison with your mind - together as ONE powerful whole. It's about developing and practicing presence.
If this type of practice sounds appealing to you and you’re ready to stop overanalyzing the "why" behind your patterns, embodied coaching might be the game-changer you’ve been looking for. Why not experience it for yourself?
Book your complimentary Jumpstart session to experience how this approach can bring rapid change, empowerment, and a sense of levity to your daily life.
You have the power to make new choices—starting with your body.
Ready to reclaim your power? Reach out today and start your transformation!
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